daredevilkink | Prompt Post #3

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

(same anon as before)

oh my god the sex thing. imagine that with ace spectrum matt tho. like idk bout you but im aro grey ace so i like to think i have a halfway decent acedar and the ace vibes were just rolling off matt to me. so like, sex-neutral acespec matt who doesn't really do the whole attraction thing but like, he's gorgeous and charming and sex feels pretty nice and there's that cultural expectation that guys have to sleep with girls (or at least SOMEBODY) and he's just like okay i guess this works?? but he really doesn't give a fuck (lmao) about sex he would be so much happier just putting on cozy pajamas and curling up with someone who will pet his hair and make him feel like a real person (not a weapon, not a failure, not broken, he's allowed to breathe and feel and be soft, there is no devil inside him clawing to be let out, it doesn't have to be hard, it doesn't have to hurt)

because for real like matt has so many goddamn issues, i would bet actual money on ptsd and depression, and like, i was the one who made that non-kinky sadism post way back on page 1 of this prompt? and just oh my god he's so messed up and so violent but i bet that if like the nelsons adopted him or something?? he almost definitely would not have the whole terrible drive to put on a mask and go out there and hurt people until they stop moving and enjoy it. like, yeah, he does it for the right reasons, but i keep thinking about the way that stick deliberately set matt apart. "men like us," he said. "warriors." i think that by age 10 his fate was pretty much set, an extraordinary man with extraordinary abilities who was always fated to become this larger-than-life vigilante couched in secrecy and violence, and i think that unless he unlearned completely that way of thinking, there was no way he could step off that path.

which is why shit like this breaks my heart because really matt just needs! a fucking hug!! theres something in him which regards himself as not a normal person who shouldn't need anything, isn't allowed accomodations because he shouldn't need them, can't have friendly contact because anything that doesn't hurt him either weakens him or puts others in danger, but like, fucking christ affectionate human touch is vital to survival, he is absolutely deserving of someone who will hold him until he feels safe. like even with foggy in canon he never fully opened up to him! matt had this vast terrible network of secrets that he felt that he COULDN'T tell foggy for both their sakes, no matter how much he might want to! partially because it's so fucking bizzare as evidenced by how incredulous foggy was in nelson v murdock, but also because he just could not open up ever to anyone.

just. god. like have you read "he has a few complexes" by telm_393? because it has a ton of everything im trying to say here. i really just want to see matt breaking down and opening up and telling foggy everything, just how bad it was, and foggy understanding and just fucking holding matt for hours and hours. like im pretty sure that matt (especially with his sensory issues) felt like the only acceptable sensations were baseline or hurting. he finally broke down and bought silk sheets because after a while he just stopped being able to deal with the terrible roughness of trying to sleep on cotton-feels-like-sandpaper-on-my-skin, waking up every morning after a few meager hours feeling rubbed-raw and like he should be bleeding even though physically there's nothing wrong, and the silk is not a luxury it's just a desperate attempt to be able to function.

just, god, i feel like matt gets so little enjoyment because of his fucking sensory issues?? like, it's impossible to mask smells. he can't eat anything processed because of the chemicals, he can taste the use-by dates and the grime that whoever handled his food missed the last time they washed their hands, his hearing is so hypersensitive that no matter what he can always hear things he doesn't want to (other people having sex, someone crying, the roar and buzz of machinery, fights, everything) and just. ugghhh i want matt to be happy so much

(same anon you replied to)

yep yep yep! co-signed, that's exactly what I was getting at. And I think it's exactly part of the reason why he never told Foggy, because then he wouldn't even have an acceptable excuse to hold Foggy's arm all the time if Foggy knew he didn't need to do it.

I mean, look at how quickly he got attached to Claire. To me, the kiss was kind of awkward? But like, in a 'I have someone who knows my secret and maybe I can keep her and she can be my girlfriend' dopey puppy kind of way? I seem to remember him holding onto her elbow while she stitched him up in his apartment too.

And and and that hug that Karen gave him. He latched right on to that.

The man needs more hugs! And kisses! And hair petting! Yes. :3

Prompt Post #3

Re: Gen: Matt is the touchy-feely one

Re: Gen: Matt is the touchy-feely one