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Re: Unpopular fandom opinions

[(Anonymous)]

I have trouble with the "nice guy" trope. I understand it is manipulative and dishonest, but I think I could have been considered a "nice guy" when it came to dating, albeit a genderswapped one. I told people I was more interested in friendship than a failed romantic relationship, and that before trying for romance I wanted a solid friendship first, and I wasn't manipulative or lying. That's really what I wanted, and I did in fact have attempts at romance that failed back into friendship. I understand that the "nice guy" isn't operating at all like that, but it takes mental gymnastics I think I'm not capable of to understand a "nice guy" mentality, because to me "friendzoning" doesn't really make all that much sense. (I have trouble recognizing several types of emotional manipulation, and simultaneously think I may have been guilty of some of them and that I'm way too straightforward to even understand where they're coming from in the first place. It's like a mental block.) So I can see a demonization of a guy who was interested in romance but settles for a friendship as a "nice guy" when he's actually just a nice guy, and I can definitely see the problem of a guy who thinks a romance is somehow owed him for his friendship. And I can see a romance blossoming out of a friendship, too, and it not being some kind of betrayal. (In fact, as I've said before, that was always my preference.)

So could you expand on this with regards to Foggy? I really don't see the offering-friendship-but-really-expecting-romance thing with him, which is what I understand a "nice guy" to be, but I can be blind to it, like I said.