daredevilkink | Discussion/Off-Topic Post #1

What's the one thing that tips you off to the fact that an author has either never had sex, or never had sex where a penis was involved?

Well there are certain things that mark a lack of knowledge of gay sex for sure - lack of lube or use of something as lube that is NOT advised irl are a biggie there. Like even someone who's never had anal sex or penetrative sex should generally be able to figure that one out, but whatever.

I personally am not super sexually active to have the breadth of experience to know for sure, but I reaaaally wonder sometimes about described sexual positions that seem particularly bendy or impossible. And amounts of cum that are possible or how quickly a guy can get it back up. Just based on conversations with other people about sex and talking to guy friends, I suspect many fic writers are pretty okay with being nonrealistic about those things.

^All excellent points that ensure this lesbian will at every opportunity avoid writing male slash (or anything focusing on a penis or penises) that isn't so far AU that I can't possibly get it wrong. This is what omegaverse and alien AUs were made for. Tbh, though, I did a ton of research when I started writing smut and then realised that a lot of readers don't seem to care. Like, if it's hot it doesn't really need to be realistic.

I got more comments on the lines of 'had to look up what a frenulum is' than anything else until I retreated from phallic reality.

AYRT - I am not saying the above things immediately make the sexy stuff bad, just that I wonder. Many unrealistic things are super goddamned hot so please, write m/m slash all you want. This fandom needs smut peddlers. Lol

Ayrt. Ah, I would never back away from smut entirely! I've just been mostly splashing in the a/b/o pool for the past few years. And focusing on non-genital-focused kink when I'm not, which people also seem to have enjoyed. :) Just gotta find your niche, I guess!

Writers who crib from bad porn give themselves away easily.
Women tend to use lived experience to make their writing better.
Guys seem more content to stay at the same one-handed writing level, despite experience.

Maybe it's just the bad ones sticking out like a magic drug free 4-hour stiffy

I guess it is experienced based but I'm always suspect of anyone who actually likes (idolizes) penises or cum of never having experienced them, to be so keen about them. LOL

I'm pretty much a lesbian and my love of fictional cum really has little to do with real cum. I just kind of love the ownership of fictional cum like the reciever of the cum has obviously just been ravished/degraded/both (depending on the situation.)

So like I prompted that one where Matt wanted to be ejaculated on by ten men who treated him like a piece of meat. The cum was the physical proof of the overall degradation which is why it was appealing.

- When two characters dry hump, cum in their pants, and then carry on with their day like they don't have a mess in their underwear.

- 'He scissored his fingers.'

- Anything that involves teeth on someone's dick or nipples (especially if it's followed by 'soothing' licks)

as a person who has zero sex-experience with another person, I always wonder that. I try my best to read from people's experinces or get any kind of references or alike but, I know that those alone are not enough to express The Smut...
right? .. idk

I'm personally very happy that most fanfic writers choose to forget that asses are for other things besides sex.

I'm personally very happy that a few writers remember that fic can be for other things besides sex, myself, but I understand that that's an unpopular opinion.

It's not really tho? Most fanfic is rated T or below (unless by 'sex' you mean shipping in general)? But this conversation was specifically about smut in fic which is why the whole conversation was about smut in fic, and not the other things fic can be for...

One of the census (censuses?) done of fanfiction actually put explicit fic at around 18% or so. So it being the predominant thing in fic is, I think, a misperception because the sexy weird stuff is what makes it's way into the mainstream or into badfic legend.

Although I do think people conflate smut with shipping sometimes, especially if they really love genfic because then it does all kind of blur together into "stuff you aren't as into" in your brain.

As a person who really loves genfic, but also has a soft spot for PWP, I can see it from both sides.

I also think it's hard because I don't find that genfic attracts the same level of quality writing as good smut does. But I don't see it as an adversarial thing where too much of one means less of the other the way some do.

I feel like this realism problem could be averted more anyway if people stopped treating anal sex as the default endpoint for sex but fandom is weirdly obsessed with penetration.

It's funny that you bring that up because I have a number of gay male friends who are not at all into anal sex or penetration and nobody thinks anything of it. So you're right that it's certainly not the be all and end all of a m/m relationship, but very few slash smut fics don't include it, or if they don't you're still meant to assume it's a part of the couple's sex life generally.

I suspect that this is because for many women penetrative sex is the default, maybe? Which could also account for why there's not more femslash? Maybe a lot of women just have a hard time conceptualizing a relationship without penetrarive sex? I could be way off base there, but it's interesting to consider.

AYRT as someone who is usually meh about penetrative sex in erotica (and sometimes squicked out by it) it drives me a little bit up the wall that there's a culture of writing m/m penetrative sex in fandom even when it would logistically be better to just not have it. Like there are so many fics where characters want to spontaneously bang and suddenly one character has lube despite never having had anal sex before and they have a really easy time of just going at it. It's not necessary or sensible for that to be happening. You can have satisfying sexual experiences without penetration, even if you have a penis.

I don't ask my gay male friends a lot about their sex lives because it's not usually my business but it seems clear to me that anal is something that you have to really prepare for so it just wouldn't happen most times. I mean, even heterosexual couples will forego PIV for whatever reason.

I think there's a lot of reasons for lack of femslash but i don't think one of the reasons is that the people revering penetrative sex are the same people thirsting for non penetrative lesbian sex. I also think in general if we didn't make it so the first smut that people found was all penetrative m/m sex then people would learn how to write non penetrative sex and realize that all 'foreplay' isn't just a precursor to penetrative sex.

Discussion/Off-Topic Post #1

Bad Smut in fanfic

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