They could take it in stages. Like, okay, handjobs count, right? They can deal with handjobs, no big deal.

(And Foggy tries to joke that everyone they know already assumes they did some fooling around in college anyway, they're just catching up with public opinion, and Matt makes himself laugh while he's frantically trying to figure out how to do this without making Foggy think that Matt doesn't want to touch him or letting on that Matt wants to touch him too much.)

But then it turns out the handjobs didn't quite cut it. So - blowjobs? More making out? A couple more consensual orgasms aren't going to hurt at this point.

Alas. Doesn't work. Something more is required.