My OCD was so severe that I spent my 15th birthday in a psychiatrist's office for the first time. But to learn there was a name for what was going on with me was just a huge relief. I thought I was going insane before I found out I had OCD.
Back then, my OCD had a lot of aspects of scrupulosity to it-- I even thought I was possessed by a demon at one point because of the disgusting intrusive thoughts I kept having. My parents sent me to a priest before they sent me to a psychiatrist, and that sure didn't help, because I just kept saying Hail Mary's compulsively...
But my OCD mostly dealt with violent intrusive thoughts and the fear of death. I had panic attacks every time I got in a car, because I was afraid of a car crash. It was really fucking awful. I had night terrors, too, and hardly got any sleep.
I did exposure-response-prevention therapy when I was 16, and it was the best decision I ever made in my life, because it gave me the tools to live my fucking life without the overwhelming anxiety. Of course, when my OCD was no longer at the forefront, it turned out I had a lot of other mental crap to deal with. I wasn't diagnosed with bipolar disorder until I was 18. But it made so much fucking sense. These days, I have to be more careful of manic episodes than intrusive thoughts, but my OCD does sneak up on me when I'm stressed or when something on the news triggers it (like a fatal car crash or something).
Idk why I'm spilling my guts on a kink meme, oh my god, but I just wanted to share with you, since you shared with me.
Re: Matt, OCD - Part 1/?
My OCD was so severe that I spent my 15th birthday in a psychiatrist's office for the first time. But to learn there was a name for what was going on with me was just a huge relief. I thought I was going insane before I found out I had OCD.
Back then, my OCD had a lot of aspects of scrupulosity to it-- I even thought I was possessed by a demon at one point because of the disgusting intrusive thoughts I kept having. My parents sent me to a priest before they sent me to a psychiatrist, and that sure didn't help, because I just kept saying Hail Mary's compulsively...
But my OCD mostly dealt with violent intrusive thoughts and the fear of death. I had panic attacks every time I got in a car, because I was afraid of a car crash. It was really fucking awful. I had night terrors, too, and hardly got any sleep.
I did exposure-response-prevention therapy when I was 16, and it was the best decision I ever made in my life, because it gave me the tools to live my fucking life without the overwhelming anxiety. Of course, when my OCD was no longer at the forefront, it turned out I had a lot of other mental crap to deal with. I wasn't diagnosed with bipolar disorder until I was 18. But it made so much fucking sense. These days, I have to be more careful of manic episodes than intrusive thoughts, but my OCD does sneak up on me when I'm stressed or when something on the news triggers it (like a fatal car crash or something).
Idk why I'm spilling my guts on a kink meme, oh my god, but I just wanted to share with you, since you shared with me.