Please look kindly upon this. This is just the setup to The Sextacular Adventures of Micha Murdock. I swear the rest will actually have descriptions and prose and things other than dialogue. ----
"Mollie-Margaret Michal Murdock you magnificent bastard. I finally figured it out. You're not just a charming, beautiful tropical fish. You're hiding something amazing."
"Wha-"
"Shh, I was too caught up thinking about this to pay attention in professor Miller's class, just let me finish. Okay?"
"O-okay"
"Mhmm, I have uncovered the truth behind your innocent act. You are no pure, sweet dove. You, Mollie-Margaret Michal Murdock..."
"Fo-foggy wait"
"... Are a secret master sex ninja"
"What?"
"That rocking thing you do when you sit. You're rubbing against the center seam of your pants. It gives you delicious, hands-free friction straight to your clit any time you want it, and you're gloriously abusing that power to it's fullest. I'm so proud, come over and feel my happy tears and teach me your secrets."
"Fo-foggy, I don-t know what you're ta-talking about. It's not uh, that. It's... It's..."
"Oh no no no no no, Micha, This is better than finding out your best friend has a crush or an embarrassing tattoo. This is finding out that your best friend is some kind of kinky sorceress, and I'm invoking my best friend rights to ask aaaaalll of the questions. Is it a blind thing? Like, are you keeping your hands free so you can read dirty Braille? Is there some kind of embossed playboy? Reproductions of the Venus of Willendorf?"
"No it's just a- just a thing I've always done. Like plucking at threads in blankets. It helps me focus if I'm feeling restless."
"Micha, you're 'restless' in almost every class we share. Definitely every time we study. So basically you've been getting off in class since who knows when and you didn't even know it? I'm so fucking jealous."
"I don't get off! I- well not in class. If I press too hard it gets distracting... And messy. And then I have to do it again... Sometimes in the library.
"I'm gonna stop you there to tell you that a) you started rocking again, and b) I'm turned on right now, and any further information about this can and will be masturbated to. "
"What, sitting in class with cold, damp underwear gets you going?"
"The fact that it's your underwear may have something to do with it."
"... Oh. Well, I could explain more. If you-if you'd like that."
Fill- Intro
----
"Mollie-Margaret Michal Murdock you magnificent bastard. I finally figured it out. You're not just a charming, beautiful tropical fish. You're hiding something amazing."
"Wha-"
"Shh, I was too caught up thinking about this to pay attention in professor Miller's class, just let me finish. Okay?"
"O-okay"
"Mhmm, I have uncovered the truth behind your innocent act. You are no pure, sweet dove. You, Mollie-Margaret Michal Murdock..."
"Fo-foggy wait"
"... Are a secret master sex ninja"
"What?"
"That rocking thing you do when you sit. You're rubbing against the center seam of your pants. It gives you delicious, hands-free friction straight to your clit any time you want it, and you're gloriously abusing that power to it's fullest. I'm so proud, come over and feel my happy tears and teach me your secrets."
"Fo-foggy, I don-t know what you're ta-talking about. It's not uh, that. It's... It's..."
"Oh no no no no no, Micha, This is better than finding out your best friend has a crush or an embarrassing tattoo. This is finding out that your best friend is some kind of kinky sorceress, and I'm invoking my best friend rights to ask aaaaalll of the questions.
Is it a blind thing? Like, are you keeping your hands free so you can read dirty Braille? Is there some kind of embossed playboy? Reproductions of the Venus of Willendorf?"
"No it's just a- just a thing I've always done. Like plucking at threads in blankets. It helps me focus if I'm feeling restless."
"Micha, you're 'restless' in almost every class we share. Definitely every time we study. So basically you've been getting off in class since who knows when and you didn't even know it? I'm so fucking jealous."
"I don't get off! I- well not in class. If I press too hard it gets distracting... And messy. And then I have to do it again... Sometimes in the library.
"I'm gonna stop you there to tell you that a) you started rocking again, and b) I'm turned on right now, and any further information about this can and will be masturbated to. "
"What, sitting in class with cold, damp underwear gets you going?"
"The fact that it's your underwear may have something to do with it."
"... Oh. Well, I could explain more. If you-if you'd like that."
"I would. Lead on, my erotic land mermaid
"Hush, or I'll keep my sex sorcery for myself."
"Of course you will, Micha. Of course you will."